We Need More Of This
Kindness.
We’re not talking about something new here. It’s always been a thing. But it seems we’re hearing about it a lot lately because we really need more of it right now. Kindness is quite simple: being friendly, generous, and considerate to yourself and others. It’s free and available to you at any time. I promise it will make you feel good too. If everyone would practice more kindness, imagine how much better our world would be! I see too many people defaulting to animosity, intolerance, and even indifference. These are dangerous emotions being displayed to other living, breathing human beings. I get that we don’t always agree with or like what someone else says, does, thinks, or believes, but is demonstrating the opposite of kindness necessary?
Show kindness to yourself. This is extremely important because you can’t give to others what you don’t personally possess. Be kind in the way you view, judge, criticize, talk to, take care of, love, and honor yourself. Be your own best friend. If you’re aren’t being kind to yourself, people will pick up on that energy and treat you accordingly. Furthermore, you won’t genuinely know how to be kind to others. It all starts here.
Be kind to people you care about. This one should be a given, but we often take things out on those closest to us. Just as you are struggling with things, they are struggling as well. Sometimes we have a tendency to take loved ones and their time for granted. Besides the obvious, here are some other ways you can show them kindness. Be fully present during your time together (get off the phone), listen to them (you don’t always have to solve their problems, sometimes just making them feel heard is enough), tell them you love and/or appreciate them often, look at things from their perspective from time to time, and communicate with them in a loving way.
Show kindness to strangers. Look people in the eye, offer a smile, and ask them how their day is going. It will literally take you 5 seconds. Do this even when you’re having a bad day. It might take your mind off things momentarily or even shift your mood. You also have no idea the impact it could have on them. They could be one asshole away from ending their own life and you could be the light that restores their faith in humanity. Imagine how it could affect you if someone offered you kindness on your worst day.
We’ve done a good job of dehumanizing people so it’s easier to condescend them. In reality, we’re not all that different. In my opinion, it mostly comes down to environment and choices. How are we similar? We’re all trying to live our lives the best we can. It doesn’t make it any easier when the people you’re interacting with daily aren’t extending a little compassion and consideration. Yes, there will always be people who will not return the courtesy . . . but so what?! That’s a reflection of them and their character, not yours. It will show favorable on your end—especially if it came from an authentic place. On the other hand, they could just be having an off day. It’s possible that on any other day the interaction would have been different. You have no idea what they may be going through at that moment in time. Even though they don’t respond the way you want them to, you did the right thing and it still might have an impact.
Lastly, in regards to social media, let’s just be more respectful. If you see that someone has posted something that you disagree with, you do have the option to keep scrolling. You don’t have to stop and offer your opposing opinion. You are NOT going to change their mind. You will start a debate that will get you fired up—for no reason—and stir up all kinds of negative energy. Then you’ll get even more mad that they don’t agree with you (which makes no sense because they didn’t agree with you before you stopped to debate them). Next time you wanna throw out something mean or words that you KNOW can be perceived as hurtful. . . maybe just don’t. Make the choice to skip it this time. Do your part to decrease some negativity and increase some positivity.
When we venture out into our city or other parts of the world, Bobby and I make it a priority to be genuinely friendly, smile, look people in their eyes, thank them, converse with them if the opportunity presents itself, and treat them with respect. And let me tell you what, we get it in return. Not to say we don’t ever encounter assholes—because we do—but it happens less when we lead with kindness. I’m also not saying that I don’t ever go South Jackson on someone who deserves it. My sassy ass has to bite my tongue way more than I used to but I see the difference it makes. It’s not our job to understand other people and why they are who they are. It’s not our job to judge them. And it’s most certainly not our job to change them. It is our job to be kind to them. And if you don’t think it is, you need to find your way back because you are more lost than you would like to admit.
